Chhaya and Amit are in a relationship for four years.They both fell for each other at first sight andtheir love seemed intense and strong. They both saw their parents fight a lot. They both were scared and yet wanted to have a partner because they needed love and support.However once they were together they started having a lot of fights.These were not regular fights. The fight would lead both of them exhausted and at times they would sleep crying over things.Their issues were too much for them to handle and the worst part was they did not even know what triggered these fights. At times when Chhaya would go out with her friends Amit would resent it.
He often said to chhaya “Tumhare paas mere liye waqt nahi hai, tumhare Dotson k liye kahan se aata hai."
At times she would also check his phone conversations and chats and get jealous to see whom he is talking with and what he's talking about. Chhaya would get upset at any candid conversation amit had with any of his female friends.
Chhaya would say to him “Apni sahelion se to bohot hansi khushi baat karte ho, unhi ke sath raha karo, mere sathkyunrehte ho"
And these fights were endless. Amit would have problem with what chhaya wore when she went out. Chhaya too humiliated him when he could not earn enough. It seemed both had found a way to humiliate each other as per their gender stereotypes.
Toxic relationships are the biggest problem rising in post modern world. The problem seem to be rising because of unhealthy pattern of relationship learned throughout the generations by both genders. Hence in a straight relationship both genders need to learn how to not fall in a trap of gender stereotypes and insults, only then they can both see a better future together. If we talk about same gender relationships the two suffer toxicity, many times due to stress that being a queer brings about in this world.
What are the signs that your relationship is a toxic relationship?
There are signs to watch out for in order to determine whether you are going through a toxic relationship or not. These signs are:
There is a pattern of either one partner or both partners humiliating each other.
You fight a lot often about the similar issues without any solutions and these fights are endless
You don’t feel comfortable talking about your emotions with each other rather you tell a third person
You do not respect each other, get jealous and are possessive of each other
You obsess about your relationship rather than feeling a sense of calm and support .
If you have these signs then you are indeed in a toxic relationship, however you can solve this problem by visiting a couple therapist. If the problem still does not go away then you need to consider parting ways with each other. You will also have to work on learning healthy relationship habits before you move to another relationship.
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